Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Spiderman 3 - Coincidence exemplified

Sorry for the laziness for so long. I am home and I have every right to be so.
The review for spiderman 3 goes something like this:

Person A (Spider man himself):

  1. Have you ever asked yourself what is the probability of you getting bitten by a mutant spider and hence you becoming spiderman?
  2. Now what is the probability that you are making out with your girl friend on a cobweb as giant as a basketball court and co-incidentally a meterorite from god forsaken sky falls within twenty metres of your make out zone?
Please understand the magnitude of the surface area of the earth and that of the meteorite in calculating the probability.

If you have been successful in deciphering the above two answers, I would like to bring to your notice that the probability of both happening to one person would be the multiple of the two factors obtained. I leave the math to you.

If that was not enough read the following:

Person B (Sand Man):

  1. What is the probability that you are being chased by cops and while evading them you co-incidentally jump a barbed fence which reads 'KEEP OUT. PHYSICS EXPERIMENTS ZONE' or some whacky thing like that.
  2. Also, what is the probability that you end up falling into a pit that is meant for some particle physics experiment and incidentally the experiment is timed to begin the moment you fall into the pit? Mind it, your body degenerates into sand particles after the experiment and you become the Sand Man. Now that you have successfully figured out the probability of the above events happening together, let me add a certain twist to the whole picture.
  3. What do you think is the probability of B being the killer of A's grandfather?

Add two more characters to the story of co-incidences and stretch the story a little bit.

Person C (Harry Osborne):

C: You killed my father.
A: No I did not.
C: Yes you did.
A: No I did not.
C: I am going to kill you.
A: No. Wait.

The fight begins. C suffers a head injury and forgets everything only to remember everything later.

C: I am your girlfriend's new boyfriend
A: Oh!
C: I will kill you
A: Lets not fight
C: Lets fight

C suffers yet again... This time it is 3rd degree face burns.

Person D (A vague free lancer photographer who wants to take Peter Parker's place):

Coming back to the probability method:

  1. What is the probability that you are at a place taking snaps of A unless you are A himself?
  2. What is the probability that A is trying to shed the foreign substance that has taken over him in church, and you are present in the same church.
  3. And then you enter the stairway and stand right below the bell, and the substance now captures you as its host?

Now comes the most important character,
Person E (Mary Jane):

''I love you A.
You dont have time for me.
I have saggy stuff.
I have a screechy voice, hence they threw me out of the troupe.
C, I think I want to spend some time with you. Lets kiss.''



''I am stuck in a giant black web. Please save me.''

some more ''AAAAAA!!!''

''Lets kiss.''

More blah and the final verdict:

Multiply all probabilities that you found in the above cases, add characters C and E, add a few more glamorous models and unnecessary guys, and dedicate a multi million dollar budget to the graphics and there you are... Spiderman 3.

The movie just had to be there. Coincidence exemplified.

My final verdict: Why would anyone make a movie that actually dilutes... wait a minute... destroys the legacy that the first two editions left behind?


amrit said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
amrit said...

Nice Review! :)

Aniket said...


shyam{no guts no glory} said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
shyam{no guts no glory} said...

Agreed to ur point.But man maths says that though u have a probability almost negligible,u cannot ignore the chance of it happening to u.The movie is based on the 3 differernt stories of spiderman.So cannot correlate to each other.Finally man u r looking at someone one who is a hero on paper.u cannot compare it to the real life.What ever it is,it's a good movie for time pass.

10:13 PM